Matthew Henry commentary on Proverbs 13:8-12
Embedded KJV/source Scripture
10 Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well advised is wisdom.
Note, 1. Foolish pride is the great make-bate. Would you know whence come wars and fightings? They come from this root of bitterness. Whatever hand other lusts may have in contention (passion, envy, covetousness), pride has the great hand; it is its pride that it will itself sow discord and needs no help. Pride makes men impatient of contradiction in either their opinions or their desires, impatient of competition and rivalship, impatient of contempt, or any thing that looks like a slight, and impatient of concession, and receding, from a conceit of certain right and truth on their side; and hence arise quarrels among relations and neighbours, quarrels in states and kingdoms, in churches and Christian societies. Men will be revenged, will not forgive, because they are proud. 2. Those that are humble and peaceable are wise and well advised. Those that will ask and take advice, that will consult their own consciences, their Bibles, their ministers, their friends, and will do nothing rashly, are wise, as in other things, so in this, that they will humble themselves, will stoop and yield, to preserve quietness and prevent quarrels.
Embedded KJV/source Scripture
11 Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.
This shows that riches wear as they are won and woven. 1. That which is won ill will never wear well, for a curse attends it which will waste it, and the same corrupt dispositions which incline men to the sinful ways of getting well incline them to the like sinful ways of spending: Wealth gotten by vanity will be bestowed upon vanity, and then it will be diminished. That which is got by such employments as are not lawful, or not becoming Christians, such as only serve to feed pride and luxury, that which is got by gaming or by the stage, may as truly be said to be gotten by vanity as that which is got by fraud and lying, and will be diminished. De male quæsitis vix gaudet tertius hæres—Ill-gotten wealth will scarcely be enjoyed by the third generation. 2. That which is got by industry and honesty will grow more, instead of growing less; it will be a maintenance; it will be an inheritance; it will be an abundance. He that labours, working with his hands, shall so increase as that he shall have to give to him that needs ( Eph. iv. 28 ); and, when it comes to that, it will increase yet more and more.
Embedded KJV/source Scripture
12 Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.
Note, 1. Nothing is more grievous than the disappointment of a raised expectation, though not in the thing itself by a denial, yet in the time of it by a delay: Hope deferred makes the heart sick and languishing, fretful and peevish; but hope quite dashed kills the heart, and the more high the expectation was raised the more cutting is the frustration of it. It is therefore our wisdom not to promise ourselves any great matters from the creature, not to feed ourselves with any vain hopes from this world, lest we lay up matter for our own vexation; and what we do hope for let us prepare to be disappointed in, that, if it should prove so, it may prove the easier; and let us not be hasty. 2. Nothing is more grateful than to enjoy that, at last, which we have long wished and waited for: When the desire does come it puts men into a sort of paradise, a garden of pleasure, for it is a tree of life. It will aggravate the eternal misery of the wicked that their hopes will be frustrated; and it will make the happiness of heaven the more welcome to the saints that it is what they have earnestly longed for as the crown of their hopes.
Embedded KJV/source Scripture
13 Whoso despiseth the word shall be destroyed: but he that feareth the commandment shall be rewarded.
Here is, 1. The character of one that is marked for ruin: He that despises the word of God, and has no regard to it, no veneration for it, nor will be ruled by it, certainly he shall be destroyed, for he slights that which is the only means of curing a destructive disease and makes himself obnoxious to that divine wrath which will certainly be his destruction. Those that prefer the rules of carnal policy before divine precepts, and the allurements of the world and the flesh before God's promises and comforts, despise his word, giving the preference to those things that stand in competition with it; and it is to their own just destruction: they would not take warning. 2. The character of one that is sure to be happy: He that fears the commandment, that stands in awe of God, pays a deference to his authority, has a reverence for his word, is afraid of displeasing God and incurring the penalties annexed to the commandment, shall not only escape destruction, but shall be rewarded for his godly fear. In keeping the commandment there is great reward.
Embedded KJV/source Scripture
14 The law of the wise is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death.
By the law of the wise and righteous, here, we may understand either the principles and rules by which they govern themselves or (which comes all to one) the instructions which they give to others, which ought to be as a law to all about them; and if they be so, 1. They will be constant springs of comfort and satisfaction, as a fountain of life, sending forth streams of living water; the closer we keep to those rules the more effectually we secure our own peace. 2. They will be constant preservatives from the temptations of Satan. Those that follow the dictates of this law will keep at a distance from the snares of sin, and so escape the snares of death which those run into that forsake the law of the wise.